Wednesday, September 14, 2011

i had my first real crush in grade nine [that says a lot about the guys in my public school], which quickly ended the day i found him 'making out' under a tree with one of my good friends. [clearly i had shade-y friends]. so i moved on. and on. and on.

aside from the one guy i recently proposed to via facebook [disclaimer: he lives in Fiji - what's a girl to do?], my dating life hasn't moved past the crushing stage. and this month has been no different.

this hot guy [and i mean 'why didn't God make you a twin?!' kind of hot] walked into my work recently, so i did what any girl would do. i fainted. just kidding. i looked deeply into his beautiful blue eyes and wooed him with my best smile. within seconds, though, my heart shattered into a million pieces [drama much?] as i glanced at his left hand. yep, you guessed it. someone liked it and put a ring on it. oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh. [sorry, couldn't resist]. needless to say, it ended there [my crush, not his marriage], and i haven't seen him since.

that is, until he showed up in my dream one night.

so here we were sitting at the beach [and by we i mean he, his wife, their two kids and i] when all of a sudden the mrs. needs to take the kids to the bathroom. perfect, i thought. time to make my move. yes me, the one who 'would never do that'. i get out of my chair, walk towards him, and, and ... i wake up. true story.

'NO FREAKIN WAY', i thought. there's no way i would do THAT!

suddenly a thought came into my mind.

how dare i judge someone for something that i myself am capable of doing.

and how dare YOU.

now don't go tying your panties up in a knot. there's no need for you to hide yo husbands [and you certainly don't have to hide yo wives and yo kids] - they'll be no climbing in your windows here. i have no intent in kissing your man when you take your kids to the bathroom. but - get this - the very thing we are quick to judge [especially in the church] is the very thing that we are capable of doing, simply because we're human and were born into sin.

do you think david EVER thought that he was capable of sleeping with bathseba, let alone murdering her husband uriah so he wouldn't get caught? my guess is no. or how about the adulterous woman? do you think she planned on sleeping with multiple men especially knowing that the consequence was [should have been by law] being stoned to death?

or how about serial killers/sex offenders/abductors nowadays? i bet if you asked randall hopley what he wanted to be when he grew up, he wouldn't have said, "i want to kidnap children" [if in fact he even did; the whole kienan hebert story seems fishy to me], but you get the point. life does some crazy things to people. so does mental illness. tragedy. compromise.

now, let it be said that in no ways do i condone such behavior. my guess is that you don't either. BUT the pendulum shouldn't be swinging on the complete opposite side either; as much as we're not to condone murder, adultery, kidnapping, or even things 'as small as' lying and gossiping [yeah, i went there], we're not to judge either.

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye" [Matthew 7:1-5]

still learning,



  1. wow! super challenging and i loled so hard (at the jokes). keep it comin', preacher mama!

  2. This is EXACTLY something that I've been challenged with recently! You're a great writer! I loved this. :)