Tuesday, June 10, 2014

1) cell phones.

i have a love/hate relationship with them. sure, they're convenient and a handy thing to have on you in case of emergency, but i can't stand the fact that no one can seem to put them down and be present. why is it that we spend way so much time scrolling newsfeeds full of crap about people we don't know anymore, never did, or don't care about, instead of engaging in conversation with people we do?

that, and they keep us from the beauty of enjoying moments alone. when's the last time you waited for a bus, sat in a coffee shop, or walked through the mall without staring at a screen? i wonder how many opportunities we miss around us, and how many beautiful moments we overlook when we fail to put our phones down.

2) PAULAtics.

i cringe every time i see a political commercial. why? because instead of letting the public know what they will bring to the table if elected [which, let's be serious, could be a lie any ways], they waste two minutes of their time - and my time - bashing their opponent. why is it that we humans feel the need to bash other people instead of shining ourselves?

3) elliot rodgers.

let me bring your attention back to a story that filled the very newsfeeds we were reading a few weeks a go instead of spending quality time with our loved ones. [just playin'].

seeking 'retribution' against both women whom he said sexually rejected him, and sexually active men who were living a 'much better life' than he was, elliot rodgers went on a killing spree, killing six and wounding thirteen.

like you, i have many problems with this.

one, the world places too much emphasis on sex and men are not entitled to it.[disclaimer: i am in no way implying that every man feels this way; i'm just merely commenting on elliot's mindset when it comes to this, knowing that he's not alone in his thinking].

we live in a world saturated with sex. so much in fact that pre-teens and teenagers are in a hurry to 'get rid of' their virginity, feel like something's wrong with them if they don't, and young adults and adults alike are jumping at any chance they get to give into their desires for both sex and intimacy far too quickly, and lack self-control as a whole.

these, of course, are just my observations, as anything i write in my blog is, but i know they hold some validity.

regardless, is sex really worth somebody's self-esteem, emotional baggage, or in this case, someone's life?

my heart breaks for young girls who think that they need to have a boyfriend to be complete, feel attractive, or be deemed worthy. we need to teach our girls to be somebodies and not somebody's.

my heart also breaks for guys like elliot rodgers, who think that masculinity is defined by the amount of notches on their bed post, and feel as though they need to prove their manhood in other ways, like resorting to violence, if they don't 'measure up' otherwise. we need to re-evaluate what being a man looks like. [again, not implying that every male or female fit into these boxes, but a lot do].

and two, stories like these only add negative feelings to the already inaccurate stigma attached to mental illness.

"oh elliot? he was just mentally ill".

oh yes, i'm sure he was, as are a lot of people, but i'm tired of this being used as an excuse when people go on killing sprees, and making it hard for people who genuinely struggle with mental illness to admit it to themselves or others in fear that they'll be deemed crazy. not all mentally ill people are crazy, in fact, studies show that people who struggle with mental illness are more likely to be victims of violence than perpetrators of it.

let's be realistic here; i've struggled with mental illness [depression] my whole life AND still haven't had sex at age 34 and you don't see me shooting anyone and everyone who has ever rejected me or is having sex as i type this.


  1. Paula, this blog is all good, but I was particularly interested in the section on Elliott Rodgers. I couldn't agree more with your points on sex in our society, and especially our young people. I especially thought the line, "we need to teach our girls to be somebodies and not somebody's" was so true and powerful. Can I send my 15 year old daughter to live with you????? :) Just kidding, but if YOU ever lead another mission trip, please let me know!! There is no-one I would rather send her with! <3

  2. how kind. i will let you know for sure!