i was reading through my journal a while a go and got a chuckle out of the below entry, dated november 18, 2005.

"if life could look the way i want it to, i would be married with three kids [and pregnant with my fourth]. i would be living in a perfect size home for the soon-to-be six of us with a beautiful backyard. i would take the kids to the park today, and then come home to write my husband a nice "thanks for working today" letter to read before his nice home cooked [swiss chalet] meal, because chicken is healthy and sooooooooo darn good. [i will cook some nights, too]. then i would tuck all three of my beautiful children [remember - the fourth is still in my belly with the chicken] in bed and read them robert munch's book, "i will love you forever". after that, i would spend the evening talking to my hubby, asking him how his day was and filling him in on mine [and all the married people laugh], but that is what life would look like today if it could".

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

my how things change.

i still love swiss chalet, writing letters to my future husband is a given, and i will most definitely read the greatest book ever written to my kids before bed, but the rest of it makes me laugh. a lot. i couldn't picture myself being a stay at home mom, let alone be expecting my fourth child. or my first for that matter.

life never goes the way we want it to, or the way we think we do, does it?

"we can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps" [proverbs 16:9]