aside from beaming with pride as i watched my students wholeheartedly serve the people in honduras, only three things kept consuming my mind during the duration of the trip: the definition of poverty, my purpose in being there, and how weary i'm feeling in life. below are three journal clippings to explain these three things further.

poverty

"being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, i think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat" [mother teresa]

poverty, to me, has nothing to do with money, or lack of possessions, how most would define it. throughout all of my traveling and working with 'the homeless', i have come to learn that the 'poorest' people [by this definition] are among the richest i know. owning possessions doesn't make one rich, love does, and love 'they' have, and love 'they' give.

pupose

i'm going through some weird emotions and can't remember if i felt this way during other trips or not. none-the-less, i must walk through them as if this is the first time i'm experiencing them.

one youth leader asked us the most difficult question today; the dreaded "why are you here?" question, which is fair. i'm not sure i have a good or acceptable answer, really. i often fight 'poverty tourism' myself. am i hear to 'look at the poor' and pretend i have a solution? no. am i here with the mindset that we canadians can come in and make a difference in a measly week? not at all. i find myself questioning why i'm here, though. for my students, yes, but it is fair to 'use' honduras to teach them? or is 'getting away' a necessary part of the learning process sometimes? [still wrestling through this]

feeling weary

i'm tired, God. tired of initiating friendships all the time. tired of encouraging people endlessly. just ... tired. but i love you. so i will keep lifting others up.

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there you have it. i have so much more on my heart today but perhaps i will keep writing and post that stuff at a later date. thanks for reading.